Sarah the Diplomatic with Lipstick

It was really hard to tell whose appearance at the United Nations seemed more awkward: Sarah Palin’s or George Bush’s. That’s a tough one.

President Bush has spent eight years antagonizing the world community, so he’s a bad fit. But for pure embarrassment, I’ve gotta go for Sarah, and her Gomer Pyle tour of the U.N. (GOOOOLLEEEEY!!!!)

No wonder they didn’t want the media listening in on her conversations. For all she knew, she was posing with cardboard cutouts during those photo-ops with the heads of state.

And what in heaven’s name did she talk about with Henry Kissinger , if she could even understand his heavy German accent? Did she tell him about her geography classes at Wasilla High School?

I wonder if, while she’s there in New York, she knows that Wall Street is in the same city — in fact, like Russia and Alaska, that it’s kind of a neighbor of the United Nations.

Maybe they could set up a tour while she’s there, so when they begin their tutorials about the economy, she will have a mental image of the buildings where all the sleazebags destroyed our future.

It’s probably asking too much for her to grasp the complexities that cause these problems that defy solution. Mindlessly reciting she’s a “maverick” just isn’t going to be enough, particularly as we learn that the maverick slogan is “Ignorance is Bliss.”

In fairness, we should never forget that the aforementioned sleazebags were highly educated. It takes a really smart bunch of nihilists to create the massive disaster they caused with all their top-of-the-class obscene greed. They have probably done more harm than any of us could possibly have done, no matter how stupid.

This is not the time, however, to put some Dumbo is a position to decide how to unravel this Gordian Knot. Or Dumba, for that matter. And by the way, Sarah, maybe you can get one of your remedial tutors to explain what a Gordian Knot is.

All in all, it probably is a good idea that Gov. Palin is speed-reading her way through a primary education on how the world works, or more accurately, doesn’t work. She will have to show off how much she’s learned in such a small amount of time when she faces Joe Biden in their debate.

She has such a huge advantage going in. It really won’t matter that Biden has schmoozed with nearly every potentate of modern times. All Palin has to do is show up and not drool during the encounter and she wins the Expectations Game.

All of this must be amusing as all get-out to the foreign government leaders she’s encountering, who are probably wondering if she is the one they saw recently on “Saturday Night Live.”

They’re probably wondering if she’s up to comprehending the political debate in Washington, as members of Congress grapple with the $700 billion gift to the investment banking perps. Does she understand the chutzpah it takes to oppose limitations on their executive compensation? Does she know what “chutzpah” means?

What does she think about punishment for those responsible? What responsibility do those in the House and Senate have in addressing their own role after decades of groveling for all the campaign contributions in return for making sure the incompetent captains of money had the leeway to get rich bringing us to our knees?

She and her handlers will be getting to that. Perhaps for starters, the Republican candidate to be a heartbeat away from the presidency could read My Weekly Reader’s “How a Bill Becomes Law.”

First, she’s gotta pretend she is very much at home on the world stage.

Visit Mr. Franken’s website at www.bobfranken.tv.