Hillary, We Hardly Know Ye

I was watching Hillary Clinton in some campaign footage this morning and it struck me: That lady must be exhausted. She has just launched her People Like Me tour, complete with the Des Moines Register endorsement ad (wearing spectacles and studiously underlining some top-secret report ) and traveling the state with her husband and old friends who are telling audiences about the “Hillary I Know,” which would be, I guess, the one we don’t know.

Remember when the year started and Hillary launched her conversation candidacy? We knew she was complex, but at year’s end we now know no words can describe her. I think, in keeping with the season, that a list will do.

Liberal. Centrist. Both.

Represents the future. Represents the past. Both.

Spouse running on Bill’s magic dust. Candidate running on her own strength. Both.

New Yorker. Illinoisan. Both.

Front-runner. Second-place slugger. Both.

Yankees fan. Mets fan. Both.

Combative. Above the fray. Both.

Pro-war. Anti-war. Both.

Not running as a woman but as the most experienced. Running as a woman. Both.

Needs Bill to run campaign. Needs to lock Bill in car trunk. Both.

Hawk. Dove. Both.

Junior senator. Former co-president with “35 years’ experience.” Both.

Warm, friendly. Cold, distant. Both.

I’m tired just thinking about it.

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