The Hill’s 12:30 Report

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NEW THIS AM — BERGDAHL SWAP WAS AGAINST THE LAW: Via The Hill’s Kristina Wong, a year-long investigation by the House Armed Services Committee has decided that the Obama administration broke the law in swapping five Taliban members for Army Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl. Why they broke the law: The administration is required to give Congress 30 days advance notice of any detainee transfers from the Guantanamo Bay detention facility. http://bit.ly/1Qy4t7I 

SERIAL. IS. BACK. (AND TAKING ON QUITE THE PROJECT): The hit podcast Serial released the first episode of season two this morning. In this season, Sarah Koenig focuses on the case of Bowe Bergdahl, the American former prisoner of war. What timing! If you haven’t seen the first season, I highly recommend it. http://bit.ly/1XYG94G

BuzzFeed’s Rachel Zarrell tweeted: wait Sarah Koenig LITERALLY called up the Taliban http://bit.ly/1IXpBxO 

CLOSER. WE’RE GETTING … CLOSER: Via The Hill’s Mike Lillis and Scott Wong, congressional leaders are inching closer to a government funding deal. What needs to happen: The text of the bill needs to be introduced by Monday. Why: House Speaker Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) pledged to wait three days before voting on the legislation. The funding deadline is tomorrow. What’s going to happen in the meantime? House Republicans unveiled a short-term funding bill that will last through Wednesday. http://bit.ly/21RzWXI 

Tweet from https://twitter.com/RepCardenas Rep. Tony Cardenas (D-Calif.) channeling his inner “Adele.” lol.:  Hello from the other side we postponed this 1000 times I’m sorry we don’t know how to legislate Republicans made us wait til the last date http://bit.ly/1HWLxOR

Come for the politics; stay for the “Elf” references. It’s Thursday, and I’m Cate Martel with a quick recap of what you missed this morning — and what’s on tap for the rest of the day. Send story ideas and comments to cmartel@digital-staging.thehill.com and @CateMartel. 

A REPUBLICAN NIGHTMARE: Via The Hill’s Niall Stanage, a nightmare scenario for the Republican establishment is coming into focus as the contest for the GOP presidential nomination increasingly turns into a three-horse race featuring Donald Trump and Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas.). Trump gets headlines for worrying Washington Republicans, but many fear Cruz, too. John Feehery, the longtime GOP strategist and Hill columnist, says of Cruz: “I think he’s a demagogue and I think he’ll destroy the party. I think Trump is much more of a blowhard.”

Sen. Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) looks like the establishment pick, but he remains well behind Trump in polls. http://bit.ly/1jQ8qaS 

NOTHING ON THE CAMPAIGN TRAIL IS PRIVATE, TED: Via The New York Times’s Maggie Habermanand Matt Flegenheimer, at a private fundraiser, Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) questioned Donald Trump’s “judgment” to be president and mused about his “strength.” http://nyti.ms/1OkbO68

The report is notable since Cruz’s public strategy has been to avoid criticism of Trump in the hope that the front-runner’s supporters might move on to Cruz.

When Cruz was asked about the interaction this morning, via CNN’s Teddy Schleifer, he said, “I’m not going to comment on what I may or may have not said at a private fundraiser.” http://bit.ly/1SQlfhE

HOW MUSLIM AMERICANS ARE REACTING: Muslim Americans are enduring some of the sharpest attacks on their faith in recent history but don’t have a strong political voice to counter them. The Wall Street Journal’s Byron Tau and Louise Radnofsky look into what they’re doing. http://on.wsj.com/1XZa111 

JEB’S CASH FLOW IS A ONE-WAY STREET: Via The Washington Post’s Matea Gold, Jeb Bush’s super-PAC is blowing through cash with little payoff. How so: In a few months, they have gone through nearly half of the $103 million initially raised, while only bringing in an additional $13 million. Why this matters: That leaves the Bush super-PAC with $67 million headed to the primaries, with not much cash flowing in. http://wapo.st/1QxTR8R 

IT’S HACKING SEASON: Via The Hill’s Katie Bo Williams, U.S. retailers are pushing back against legislation mandating tough new cybersecurity, even as hacking threats increase during the holiday season. Here’s why:http://bit.ly/1NPdiVy 

AN AWKWARD GLARE: At a Women Rule event in D.C. this morning, Hillary Clinton senior advisor Karen Finney, Carly Fiorina’s Deputy Campaign Manager Sarah Isgur Flores, Purple Strategies Margie Omero, former White House communications director Nicolle Wallace and DSCC’s Simone Ward discussed women on the campaign trail. Notable moment:

– Sarah Isgur Flores – “I don’t want to vote for someone because she’s a woman. I want to vote for the best person to be president and I hope that’s a woman someday.” Hillary Clinton adviser Karen Finney glares back.

WHAT EVERYONE’S TALKING ABOUT ON SOCIAL: Bloomberg’s Margaret Talev sat down with Vice President Biden. The gist: Biden is content with his decision not to run for president, confident Americans will reject Trump and is focusing his final year as VP and his post-political life on cancer research. http://bloom.bg/1TBDG9I 

CATCH-UP ON SOCIAL:

Politico’s Burgess Everett
The number of people asleep in the Senate daily gallery is usually greater than zero http://bit.ly/1Q0Lbtl  

Rep. Seth Moulton (D-Mass.)
Rumors abound about the Omnibus and CR and whether we’ll be voting this weekend. Everyone’s going around asking, “What have you heard?” http://bit.ly/1IFpM61 

The Hill’s Cristina Marcos
Cheers ensued in the House chamber as @GOPLeader McCarthy announces there won’t be weekend votes. http://bit.ly/1OiUWwA 

Erin Ruberry, Digital at the Peace Corps (This is pretty ugly…but I’m already biased. Birds terrify me.)
This is what a partridge looks like, just in case you see one in a pear tree http://bit.ly/1Y31CEk 

ON TAP:

12 p.m. EST: Speaker Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) is meeting with Israeli President Reuven Rivlin in the Speaker’s ceremonial office at the Capitol.

Now until 4 p.m. EST: AtlanticLIVE is holding an LGBT summit. Featured speakers include Sen. Tammy Baldwin (D-Wis.), WNBA Player Layshia Clarendon and former Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.) Live stream: http://theatln.tc/1OS5d5K 

1 p.m. EST: The Federal Bureau of Investigation, Department of Homeland Security, and National Counterterrorism Center are providing a classified briefing on the terrorist attack in San Bernardino to all Congress members. http://bit.ly/1jQ8qaS  

4:15–5:15 p.m. EST: The House will vote on suspensions. Here are the details: http://1.usa.gov/1NP192K 

Now for the fun stuff… 

THE BEST WAY TO SPREAD CHRISTMAS CHEER: Elf the Musical has launched in New York! Here are the dates and times: http://bit.ly/1XX4yrm 

CHUBBY BABY PARENTING PERKS: There’s a Japanese trend where parents are squishing their babies’ faces to look like a rice-ball. It’s adorable. http://on.today.com/1Y38pxW 

A NOTE ABOUT THE CHRISTMAS BAR: Earlier this week, I mentioned a pop-up Christmas bar in D.C. I’ve heard from a half dozen subscribers that while it’s great, the line to get in is insane. If you go, plan to wait at least an hour — but it’s worth the wait.

Today is National Lager Day! This would have been better suited for a Friday, so celebrate in moderation, friends. I don’t want you miserable when you read tomorrow’s 12:30 Report!

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