Incivility will not fix this crisis

After years of spiraling decline, civil discourse is once again front and center in our national conversation. It has been forced into the discussion over the administration’s inhumane decision to separate children from families. The media spotlight on the issue has emboldened a righteous anger. We have reached another turning point when Trump opponents celebrate obscenities by Robert De Niro and encourage more episodes like the expulsion of Sarah Huckabee Sanders from a Virginia restaurant.

Let us start by acknowledging an important truth: We are not going to fix any of our nation’s problems with more incivility. Congresswoman Maxine Waters (D-Calif.) is way out of line when she calls for more harassment of officials in the Trump administration. Declaring that Donald Trump is a “president who deserves a bit of profanity” will only sharpen the polarization that is tearing our social fabric and there is absolutely no place for incendiary tweets by Peter Fonda about Barron Trump.

{mosads}Imagine that lawmakers make the political calculus that they can no longer be seen speaking with members of the opposite party. How would it help us move forward if protestors rained down scorn upon Democrats and Republicans who decide to eat lunch together?

We are also facing the very real danger of slipping into false equivalency. Calls for civility should never be used as a smokescreen for shifting the debate away from injustice. There needs to be pushback when Judge Jeanine Pirro of Fox News, who up to this week has never been concerned with civility, uses her podium to move the conversation away from family separation to invoke civil discourse.

This debate is about far more than just manners. The demonstrators around the country using incivility and calling for more of it are fighting an egregious family separation policy and confronting a side of Washington that regularly refuses to play by the rules. This is an administration that has a troubling relationship with the truth, evades questioning by the media, and at times openly undermines the Constitution.

It took a long and painful march forward to achieve the aspirations of our founders to establish shared values and norms. These include honesty, inclusion and respect for the rule of law in our political conversations as citizens of this country. We are now taking serious and disturbing steps backward. We are going to need civility if we want to climb out of this. It remains a foundational element of our American system and it is integral to solving each and every issue moving forward.

President Trump is one man. This is a democracy run by three branches of government. There are 100 people in the United States Senate and 435 in the House of Representatives. Nine justices sit on the Supreme Court. These are not just numbers. These are the men and women who have an obligation to work together to solve the issues facing our nation. We the people have an obligation to do the same. Our system of government is tied to our ability to debate controversial issues, find compromise, and pass laws that shape and move our country forward. Our Constitution sets a framework that demands Americans find common ground.

If the federal government codifies a law against family separation, it will be because members of Congress, regardless of party, come together and pass a bill that they convince President Trump to sign. Both sides must continue to collaborate. But nothing will happen if they refuse to speak with one another. We need to create conditions that can make progress possible because our democracy is under extreme stress.

It is incumbent upon each and every one of us to do what we can to ride out the storm and find ways to rebuild across the divide. We should be looking for ways to demonstrate empathy by acknowledging feelings without surrendering facts. It is still a worthwhile endeavor to follow the golden rule by treating others as we want to be treated. It is most definitely possible to practice nonviolent resistance to policies that are deemed abhorrent without letting rage degrade the tactics of resistance.

Democracy is a conversation and the quality of that conversation matters. This current uncivil and disrespectful conversation is an open threat to our democracy. Now is the time for each and every one of us to be vigilant and take a stand for civility and respect, so that we preserve our democracy for generations of Americans to come.

Carolyn J. Lukensmeyer is the executive director of the nonpartisan National Institute for Civil Discourse at the University of Arizona.